Testing, Testing, 1 2 3 -- 10!

I don't usually post the results of these things, but I am happy to know that a) I get to continue being a citizen and b) I aced the "test" on the web. Phew. This'll keep the NSA agents away a little longer.

You Passed the US Citizenship Test

Congratulations - you got 10 out of 10 correct!

Could You Pass the US Citizenship Test?

Then and Now

From a school cafeteria in Gaithersburg High School to a Denny's in Montgomery Village, it is nice to know you can still hang out with some of your best girlfriends over pancakes.


May, 1987


November, 2005

Call it Reality and the Suburbs, rather than Sex and the City.

Elsewhere:

This is what happens when you don't bring your digital camera to Halloween -- you don't get everyone else's pictures until Thanksgiving. You can never have too much Sydney, my Jumpy Monkey. At least, I can't.


Credit where it's due: I made this one, but the idea for the cannibalistic pumpkin can be found here.


Taking a gander


As Minnie Mouse. Kinda.

What a turkey

So, the good news is it was just a 12 hour bug, and that it happened the day before Thanksgiving, rather than the day of. I was so sick for those 12 hours, though, that even seeing food on the TV was making me want to retch. So I got on the sofa around noon (having had to leave a hair appointment early; at least she got to finish the trimming, or I would have had a half-cut head of hair) and didn't budge until "Law & Order" shut off. It was a nasty, nasty day, though I'm now well caught up on "MASH" reruns, "General Hospital," VH1 Classic Super 70s videos, and "Bull Durham." Also Oprah, who is giving away homes to 50 Katrina victim families. Say what you will about her personally, but she does things with her money that I'd like to think I would do if I had that kind of dough. Someone in my family groused that she should do it anonymously, but the point is: When Oprah does something, millions of others contribute. She bought the houses, but set up a gift registry on her Web site so people could donate household goods; another $5 million came in that way. She may be a bit self-aggrandizing, but she can have that, if the good she does comes out this way.

OK, a bit more on Oprah there than I meant to contribute.

Anyway, speaking of saintly things, I mainly wanted to point out to the 2.5 regular readers I might have here that "Angels We Have Heard Are High" will be starting up at one of my favorite other blogs, "Going Jesus." Head on over there starting this Sunday; meanwhile, be sure to check out the wonderful kitsch at "The Passion of the Tchotchke" and "Cavalcade of Bad Nativities." Marvelous!

UPDATE: "Angels We Have Heard Are High" will be located here. For those keeping score and all.

Living, in progress

An update: The last house I pictured here of the house I thought mom had bought was, in fact, a model. This is the latest update. They're having theirs built from the ground up. Which explans the apocalyptic landscaping. At least it looks like they're going to have sidewalks. I'm just anti-design which dictates that the garage has to be half the length of the house itself. Can we not just dig an underground basement and park that sucker away where nobody has to think about it?

Another great picture:



Lynda makes the Baltimore Sun! (They're watching the great new Robert Greenwald documentary, "Wal-Mart: The High Cost of Low Price." I sent it to my mom, who couldn't access the link, but apparently realized the article had something to do with Lynda and Wal-Mart. The response? "I thought she hated Wal-Mart!" So much to explain, so little time.

I like the picture because everyone looks like they're pretending so hard not to be aware that they're having their picture taken. Except for the woman on the far left. She's totally goofing on it.

The Towering Inferno

Mom hit the jackpot this year. Best. Birthday present. Ever. (And bonus points for its only semi-practical nature, since you can't just fire up the choco-fountain every day for the hell of it. Well, you could, but if I did I'd just sit on the couch until I was 480 pounds and had to be moved off of it with bits of fiber sticking to me. Eww.)

(No, that's not the exact one she sent, but it's close. And it will be used very shortly at a party. And yes, I'm sure this is to the '00s what cheese fondue was to the '70s, but I don't care. It's chocolate. Melted chocolate. Dippable melted chocolate in an appealing presentation format. OMFG.)

That was a digression. Anyway, mom wins for this year, and for anybody who didn't even send me a bloody email (and you know who you are, people), no chocolate for you.

Pretty in pink

Sydney Renee is two! And J.C. Penney portrait photos have captured three of her most endearing moods:


Trippy Happy


Mildly Terrified (and/or) Embarrassed


Playing With Chapstick

Happy Birthday Beautiful Niece!

Welcome back, Potter

Went to see the new Harry Potter film today, "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire."

I enjoy these films; they're usually visually beautiful, they're all full of English people, and I dig that a whole generation of kids are learning great phrases like "taking the mick(ey)" and "brilliant" and "piss off." The anglophile in me rejoices.

I've read the first four books, and tend to read the next in line close to when the film's coming out. I enjoy them. They don't fascinate me and I don't adore them the way some do -- like the screaming teenage (girls, mostly) who were crushing one another outside the Zeigfeld theater tonight (one held a sign saying she'd been there since "six," and since it was 3:30 in the afternoon, that's a bloody long wait) and screaming every time a tinted-window car drove up. When an actor from the film actually emerged, it was near pandemonium. One police fence was nearly bending over under the crush.

So, looking forward to the film, it's fun to see with real fans and kids, and it was nice to watch. I enjoyed it, as I knew I would. The problem with any of the Potter films, of course, is that they'd really be better served by a mini-series, particularly the latter ones. There's so much information in the books, so much plot and goings-on that it'd be nice to actually have one of these films breathe. This one was two-and-a-half hours (!) and still left out a lot. And the woman I sat next to, who co-edits the fan site "The Leaky Cauldron," seemed to agree. That said, I felt a bit like a cheat for just enjoying it while -- towards the end -- audible snifs could be heard around me. I mean, anyone who's read the book (and that's anyone in that theater) knew what was coming, yet -- snifs! Good for them.

All of that said, watching the film reminded me of two other things which routinely annoy me about the whole series.

No. 1: Despite having saved the school multiple times, despite having killed off (well, or so it seemed) the Most Evil Wizard Ever, He Who Shall Not Be Named, despite basically being a self-effacing, slightly geeky, uber-nice guy who would otherwise blend into the tapestries, every single book and movie seems to be populated with a school of people who have no memory of Harry Potter's prior good acts. Or that he always triumphs and is vindicated. Or that he will do something like risk his own life for his friends. Nope: In "Goblet," for example, immediately everyone -- including his best male friend, Ron -- assumes the worst of him when his name comes out of the cup, despite that they know it isn't physically possible. Ron turns on him. The schoolkids wear "Harry Stinks" badges (another Brit word I'm hoping gets picked up here). Snape still accuses him of stealing from the potions cabinet. It's as though all of the accomplishments of the previous books mean nothing, and that's not only frustrating, it feels like bad plotting. We know we're building to a conclusion in just one more book; why aren't the books showing us character development beyond the three main friends?

No. 2: Ths is the one that would probably get me beaned with the Goblet by fans, but the truth is, Harry's not really much of a hero. He has his moments -- the whole saving two people at the risk of his own life, etc. -- but the thing is, Harry doesn't act. He is acted upon. He shows up, and is put upon, pushed around, given advantages or help by friends, and just kind of buffets along. I thought about this again when I flashed by "The Wizard of Oz" on TBS this evening: Dorothy acts. She may get blown not by her own accord into Oz, but she gets up and immediately starts taking action. She has a goal, she wants to get out. She helps people along the way by taking action, and when there's a bucket of water, she flings it. If Harry Potter was blown into Oz, he'd sit around until Glenda led him by the hand to the Scarecrow, and the Scarecrow would urge him to go to the Emerald City, and so on. Harry's remarkably passive (I'm sure there are exceptions, but this is an overall take). Hermione and Ron are the actual heroes here, they do things and think things and get things done and seem to have emotions. Harry is just there.

No. 3: I just thought of my third problem, but this is more of a projection: I'm really, really, really worried this is all going to end up as another "Star Wars" -- namely that Harry will somehow be Voldemort's son. I worry about that, because then I'm really going to feel I wasted my time on this series. Not that it's a bad story turn -- but, you know, done.

Keeping an Eye On Things

For some reason, I'm iffy about camping (though getting better) while I love watching other people in survival situations. And nobody entertains me better than Les Stroud, who I discovered accidentally a few months ago on The Science Channel, with a show called "Survivorman." Who knew The Science Channel even existed? (And no, it's not the same as Sci-Fi Network.)

The setup is this: The guy strands himself in any number of remote locations with minimal equipment (plus his own cameras) and has to survive for a week. Mostly, he'll get picked up as he walks to civilization, but the one I'm in the middle of watching right now where he's stuck in the Costa Rican jungle, he says he's not getting rescued. Oy.

He's not like Mr. Iron Man/Mountain Man. He's a pretty regular looking guy and has no problem pointing out to us where he's not doing so hot (this episode has him with an infected toe from a blister gotten while hiking), and you gotta feel for the guy -- a lot of the time he barely eats for all 7 days, because food is so scarce. But what's really inspiring is to see how he takes care of business, whether that's creating a shelter, making a fire, finding and catching and cooking food, and at last, escaping. I'm fascinated, and I wish the shows weren't only an hour long. Thus far there only appear to be ten of them, but I'm hoping he'll make more. Or put these on DVD. Anyway, I now have a huge investment in, of all things, the Science Channel.

Go Les!

I Mess With Texas, Part 2

Clearly, this is going to be easier than I thought.

3) Neal Pollack is leaving Austin.

Though we only ever shared an email or two (he was whinging on his blog about not getting enough freelance, I contacted to see if we could work something out, he then got a gig -- which apparently is now taking him to LA), having someone with his attitude and smarts and cool factor was always a big plus. I could actually say I "knew" someone there. (Heh.) And now, he's going. In part, he says:

(L)ast night's election had nothing to do with my decision to leave Austin and move to Los Angeles, which was made months ago, but I certainly feel glad about my decision today....

He then notes:

Texas is largely misunderstood by the rest of the country. It's far more cosmpolitan, well-educated, and sophisticated than people might think, given the corrupt religious hypocrites it's sent onto the national stage in recent years. But because of those hypocrites, if anyone is going to fully audition the radical right's loony social agenda, it will be the government of this state. Today, someone said to me, "at least you don't live in Kansas." True enough. But who's to say that in 10 years, when my son is preparing to enter high school, the schools here won't be teaching "intelligent design" as well? I'm not taking that risk with my family.

A-fuckin'-men. My poor niece.

Administrative Alert

Anybody trying to call me at home, I'm not going to have home phone service until November 28.

Don't even ask: The evilness will be explained once I'm calmer.

Anyway, call my work number or send me an email in the interim if you need me.

That is all!

I Mess With Texas, Part 1

So, since the family units are moving there before the end of the year, and when confronted with the alarm that is most people's response to "We're moving to Texas" they seem, well, baffled, I'm going to start compiling a list of reasons why the place sucks. I will, therefore, be messing with Texas.

In no particular order:

1) Voters Reject White Settlement Name Change

1a) The fact that the story's lead (from NBC in Dallas/Fort Worth) is: "Residents held on to their heritage Tuesday night and voted against changing their town name to West Settlement, despite proponents' arguments that the name has racial connotations."

That's right! Heritage above all! I'm all in support for Cracker, Minnesota. And Honkytown, Illinois works, too.

2) Texas Voters Approve Ban on Gay Marriage

Unconstitutional assholes.

Continuing....

Lies, Damn Lies, and Half-Truths I've Heard Recently

1) Back in the 1960s, when she declined to give her seat up to a white man, Rosa Parks infuriated a lot of black people. They were happy as things were and didn't need the civil rights movement.

2) Homeless people want to live on the street. That's why they're there.

3) Because Roe v. Wade hasn't been overturned, free and legal abortion is available to all in the United States.

As they say, denial ain't just a river in Egypt.

For more on No. 3: Go to Salon.

Fall comes to Jackson Heights

Mentioned in today's NY Times Real Estate section and the leaves turned! It's been a good weekend here, even though it won't last. Some images:










These birds were simply pissed at some other bird, which had dived for cover into this bush. In fact, the one looking at camera now still seems pissed.

Being a footnote

Over at Lynda's blog, a discussion has sprung up about the people surrounding the Rosa Parks story. And I'm intrigued. I think there's a whole one-act play in what it was like to be the bus driver who harrassed her, or the white man who wanted her seat. I mean, if you're one of those guys, is that something you want known? Do you tell your kids? And if so, is it with pride? Or is this a secret shame?

Who were those guys?

The driver was James Blake. According to a quote in the Wikipedia entry, he was only following orders. Here's a bit more on how his role in history is interpreted.

I'm left thinking of my all-time favorite Demotivator (pictured above).